Mixed Bag

Of emotions that is. So I awoke-feeling glad that I had yet another day of no work, but also feeling a little crabby, cause I was feeling cramps. After a visit to the bathroom, I realized I have my period... :(
I thought I would cry right away, instead I tried to search for my feelings. I knew I was disappointed, but I also felt numb. When you're trying to get pregnant, your period is the last thing you want. I would welcome, aching boobs, bloated-ness & all that comes along with the beginning of being pregnant, but I won't be celebrating any of these feelings for at least another 30 days.
So I had a day thus far of praying, walking @ Duke Forest & shopping @ Target.
Part of me wishes I could truly express what I'm feeling, and the other part just wishes I could cry & believe that when it will happen it will.