From Bean town to California to an unexpected North Carolina. We gave birth to this Blog after our miscarriage in July 2008 & it continues with the birth of Liliana in July of 2009. We are so truly blessed.
We took these over the weekend. I think I have finally popped. Not much other words to say besides, I worked 13 hrs. today, I need some down time, before I sleep & do it all over again tomorrow..... :)
My thoughts on my week: 1.Work: On giving/ getting report. So nurses sign off of her patient's to the next nurse is called, 'report'. These minutes & sometimes 1/2 hour can be torturous. By this I mean some people want details that are irrelevant when a patient has been there 2, 3, 4+ months. ITs annoying. Other times, you can tell they are listening & then not, & then they expect you to repeat what you just said. Seriously, I've been here already for 12+ hours--I want to go home, is what I'm thinking when someone does this to me. Then for these folks, they are not appreciative, you may have organized the bedside, hung new fluids/replaced old lines...really set them up nicely for their shift, but all they want to do is knit-pick...it is annoying!! Then on the flip side when you know someone or at least you know they know the patient & report won't be so painful, I'm always delighted when I see those people. (ok-I feel a little better :) ) 2.Secondly--(kind of follow up to #1) My primary pt. is going home soon, strange for me, he has been there since November, I'm gonna miss him, but I am doing all I can to get him home. The Docs. haven't technically ordered discharge paperwork yet, but I and some other nurses have gone through MOST of the discharge teaching for him with his parents so it will be a smooth transition on the day he does go home, probably this coming week. It will be weird when he isn't there, you form a bond to the patient, & to the parents. It will be bittersweet. 3.My pregnancy- I am 5+ months pregnant & most of the time I don't feel like it, is this normal. What is normal? I want to feel the babe move. I want to know they're ok. In mind if I can get over the 28 week hump, I will feel better. We admitted 23 week triplets at work last week. The biggest of the three already died--the 300 & 400gramers are still on the unit. That is so daunting to me I am just about 22 weeks. 4.Life--I love lists, I have a list of 'to dos' that I keep checking off & at the same time it feels like it keeps getting longer. I'm starting to nest too. I want to get our bedroom painted, get curtains & hang some photos soon. Plus the babe's room, I need to be inspired on that a bit. We have colors in mind & then I look on OhDeeDah's website & find different things I like. I don't want to commit to that quite yet. IKEA trip is next week for us, we've found quite a few things that we like there--crib, dresser/changing table. Plus, one of my favorite artist JJ Heller is having a concert in Charlotte March 1st, so we figure we'd wrap it into one trip overnight--can't wait.
So I'm not the super mushy type, I don't think, BUT I know I am definitely sentimental about things. Like today is Valentines Day, I don't expect flowers & candy & all that jazz but I do like to recognize the day & I do like surprises-no pressure Eli, really. I love my husband for many reasons: initially it was because he made me laugh, he was a good manager (yes he was my boss), but it was the way he interacted with other people which is what I noticed when I first met him a 24. No one I had met before had so much respect & so much heart. All these years later I love him for those reasons plus so many more than I could ever list. He is truly my best friend. I miss him when he's not around & look forward to sharing my daily adventures with him. This new journey that we're on now is amazing--we are not parents yet, but I've already pictured us in those roles--Yes even being in our thirties & saying 'parents' is weird to me. Ok, I have parents, but to be a parent--wow.
So to my Valentine on this lovey-mushy-heart day--I love you!! Pappa to be.
& to our babe to be, we don't even know you yet, but already love you too. I dream big for you & we can't wait to share with you all the things we love to share together. The great outdoors: to hike & camp & bike with you, to bring you to my favorite place, the ocean. To just watch you grow...we look forward to the day of your birth.
So day #2 of work today, & around 11am my charge nurse informed me that I may need to float to the Peds. floor. The floor--ICU nursing is VERY different from floor nursing. I've known this, but this was CONFIRMED today. I like being an ICU nurse, I don't like floor nursing. But I sucked it up & went, our floor is low on census & its staffed well, unlike the Peds. floor which is understaffed & high on census. So the super sucky part was I liked my pt. load I had today in ICN- I was with my primary...it was a good day. Regardless I gave report to someone that was taking my pt. load & then I had to go & get report for 4 new babies...blablabla. I was a chicken running around with its head cut off, it was an interesting afternoon, plus I had to travel with one of my patient's to Radiology for a procedure. So long story short kudos to floor nurses, I'll stick to the critical babes. :)
Here we are @ 20 weeks, belly is definitely expanding, but otherwise I feel great. I don't feel intent movements quite yet, but plenty of flutters, just so I know that you're there. I've tried laying on my belly suggested by a friend to see if I can feel more, but I never last quite that long in that prone position. Also suggested by another friend, I've been examining in the inside of my eyelids--to predict male or female, still don't see quite a difference yet. This journey is fun. I've been pretty good about not worrying too much, I eat & sleep when I want--as long as I'm not a work. All in all, work so far is good, I've been splitting up my shifts (no more 3 in a row) so I don't do ~40 hrs in three days, thats helped a lot. Its amazing to me that my body knows what to do, I sleep, eat & exercise and the physiology & growth of this human is happening inside of me, pretty crazy stuff.
Today was a bitter sweet day, I came home from working the night shift slept ~ 5hrs, went to our 20 week appt. (which was pretty quick-our walk back & forth was longer), heard about our neighbor who's still in the hospital from Eli, and then did our typical clean up before community group this afternoon. This being the last one that we're leading seems not quite real yet. We didn't grow in numbers as we prayed to do but dove deeper into community with some really amazing couples. As we split & take on new roles, only God knows where he'll take us. Time for bed--nighty night.
To our surprise this morning an ambulance, actually two were parked out front this morning. We both immediately went outside to see what was happening in our neighborhood, only to find out that they were for our close neighbors' house. We went right in & called for her & went up to her bedroom. Yes, I think we're pretty close. The EMTs were already working on getting vitals & setting up the leads for their portable EKG... VS were stable and the EKG showed nothing abnormal, but she was in excrutiating pain. You feel helpless, even though its not about you, but you want to do so much. They brought her to Duke, and I followed. It was a long day for her: 2 doses of morphine anti-nausea meds.--lots of vomit, more pain & a new pain med that finally hit her, well made her feel a lot better. After an x-ray then a CT..confirming that she has a small bowel obstruction. I watched the nurses, the doctors, heard other patients in pain. Its weird to be in a situation & not be able to help more.
I pray that she is doing better, I know she has been through this before, but to live alone & deal with it seems overwhelming. Good prayers & thoughts for Shirley.