What will that DAY be like??

So working at a hospital brings about a lot of self-inflicted questions, crazy surroundings, & an awareness that one might not be privy too otherwise.
I see a lot, hear a lot & do things to newborns that one wouldn't normally do. I strangely enjoy (at times) these disfunctional things.
Don't take me wrong, I don't 'enjoy' sick babies, but its fascinating what science can do & a whole lot of hope & prayers.

Recently I am quite moved when I see moms being rolled in via wheel chair or gurney onto the L & D floor. I don't work w/moms pre-labor but the NICU is conveniently located next door. Lately I get chills when I see them being rolled in....knowing (praying that, that will be me w/Eli in about 26 weeks or at leas 22 weeks. What will that day be like, I'm already envisioning a lot about that day. What control will I have over my body, if any. Will I freak out. How Eli will deal with me, probably better than I can deal with myself.

Last night when I worked I had the opportunity to go back to the stabilization room right next to where a mom was laboring. All I heard were screams from the laboring mom, which alone kind of moved me...will I be that vocal...mmm. Then the Stabilization team did this swift dance of prepping the bed for the 28 week pt. that we were about to basically 'Stabilize'. There were 2 doctors, 1 nurse practioner, 1 RN & a respiratory therapist....plus myself, onlooker for being the virgin in the room, it was pretty cool to watch the baby transition from womb to warm table & all the tasks that had to be done to stabilize him. Then he came to my room, I had the first admit spot....what an interesting night.